Cords of the Heart
by TXJ
Summary: Music can be soothing for the soul, it can also stir up heart wrenching emotion. May music mend two shattered souls. Eventual RenTat pairing.
1. Five Candles

**Disclaimers/Intros/Other:** I do not own Bleach or any of its characters, Mr Tite Kubo does. I am not and will not make any money off of writing this. The parts in italics I do now own, they are lyrics, songs and arts will be credited at the bottom of the page. Read and enjoy.

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_Look around your world Pretty Baby  
Is it everything you hoped it'd be  
The wrong guy  
The wrong situation_

Renji meandered across the court yard of Karakura High School. Classes had been out for a few hours now, but this was the most direct route to Urahara's Shop. Renji sighed as he looked up into the multicolored sky. Sunset already, fall left so few hours after the dratted human classes before dusk over came the earth. It sucked that those hours were spent dispatching low level hollows and ushering souls to the other side. Lately Renji found himself dreading his Shinigami duties more and more. He found that 'stupid human' look haunting him from time to time. He had requested more than once to return to the Seireitei, but his captain denied him. Rukia and Ichigo had gone back to Hueco Mundo to look for Ashido Kano. By the time Renji found out, they had already been gone for two days. The fact that his friends failed to let him know they were even going still left a bitter taste in his mouth. That taste was just one more thing making Renji upset with himself. He was just about to scream out all of his frustrations and angers to the world when the strumming of a guitar hit his ears. His eyes flicked around the open area lined with only a few trees and shrubs. It only took him a minute to pick out the silhouette of someone sitting in a tree holding a guitar. Renji moved a few paces closer, curiosity making him want to know who was producing the cords.

**_A pr__omise or a dare  
I would jump if I knew you'd catch me  
Staring over the edge  
I can't tell if you'll be here for me_**

The words drifted to his ears and sent a chill through him. He still could not clearly see who was sitting in the tree, however he could the voice was female.

**___I close my eyes and make a wish  
Turn out the lights and take a breath  
Pray that when the wick is burned  
You would say that it's all about love_**

Completely mesmerized by the cords drifting to his ears Renji paid little head to being noticed himself and paid sol attention to figuring out who was creating the moving sounds. He was more than a little shocked to find that the voice belong to Karakura's number one tomboy, Tatsuki. He was debating whither or not to torment the girl about her music skills come the next day when she stopped playing and dislodged herself from her perch in the tree. Renji stayed where he was uncertain if this friend of Ichigo's was able to see him or not. She continued on never looking back at him. Renji stayed where he was, the snippet of tune turning through his head as he watched the sky fade from vivid orange and purple to black. The song stirred emotions inside of Renji that he had been trying to avoid thinking on. In his eyes the song reflected a friendship where the strength was starting to fade. A friendship much like his and Rukia's he sadly reflected. He felt sick that he was no longer sure if he could count on her to be there for him, to understand him, to need him. Renji sighed, doing his best to push the traitorous thoughts out of his head, he had home work to do and the whole of Urahara's shop to sweep if he wanted dinner.

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**AN/Credits:** First set of lyrics: Spin Doctors **"Pretty Baby"**

Second and Thrid set of lyrics: Jars of Clay **"Five Candles _(You Were There)_"**

I plan to add more to this later, eventually ending up with a RenxTat pairing, but a lot of fun emo-singing inbetween.


	2. Hold On

**DC: I do not own Bleach, it's characters, locations or coolness. I do not own the lyrics used in this chapter. No misuse is met, and I make no profit off of this.**

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_Oh, I hear a voice  
That says I'm running behind  
Better pick up my pace  
It's a race and there ain't no room for someone in second place_

Renji Abarai wanted to rip something a part. It was bad enough that he spent his daylight hours chasing down hollows; but to track them only for them to disappear moments before he arrived at the spot, it was too much. It had taken him six phantom hollows before he picked up on the trace reiatsu of the Quincy. When confronted Uryu Ishida, in his usual smug tone, informed Renji that Karakura was his town too and that the shinigami was simply too slow if he had been playing 'catch-up' all afternoon. Renji knowing better than to kill the last of an overly obnoxious breed, had stalked off making excuses about wanting a night off anyhow.

A soft breeze played about the evening air. While it was autumn the weather was still warm and the trees still clung tightly to their now multi-colored leaves. The beauty of mother nature in the fading sunlight cooled Renji's temper. His feet carried him of their own will into the school yard. Deep down he knew why he was there, he had found himself humming the tune from the other day under his breath all week; so it was no surprise to find Tatsuki in the same tree plucking away at her guitar.

_**Cause you've got so much to give**_

_**But you throw it all away**_

_**And all you've got to show**_

_**For who you are is pain**_

She paused, gave a defeated sigh, shook out her hand and started strumming the guitar with a fiercer attitude. The tune was darker, faster and seemed more like the person he saw in school.

_**Hold on, be strong**_

_**So right, so wrong**_

_**With all of our senses**_

_**All of our defenses**_

_**Hold on be strong**_

Renji watched, completely enthralled. The song was a rock song, popular on the radio though she still didn't know artist names. Current music trends for this world were still very new to him.

_**New arrival, our survival**_

_**Still not certain**_

_**What's a virtue, where do you go**_

_**When you're hurting?**_

He found himself muttering the lyrics under his breath as she sang, no – cried them; her voice cracked and the music stopped. She mumbled something but he was to far away to make sense of it. She looked up, and he could have sworn directly at him, her eyes glittering with unshed tears as the setting sun played across them. She said nothing and made not reaction to him being there. She hopped out of the tree and strode off. Renji watched wondering what was running through her mind, slightly happy that she hadn't seen him watching her in such an emotional state.

_

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_

You see that I can play a pretty convincing role  
So I don't need you, I don't think I need you

The next day, Renji couldn't help but over hear Orihime ask Tatsuki why she wasn't home all of the evening before. Renji was surprised when Tatsuki said she stayed late 'practicing her moves', and even more shocked to find out that she had stood Orihime and Ishida up on a planned outing. Orihime had canceled when she couldn't reach Tatsuki, which explained the Quincy's need to kill the previous night.

Renji thought about saying something about Ishida's disappointment but he happened to make eye contact with Tatsuki first, the one look made his blood turn colder than Rukia and Hitsugaya's zanpakutos combined.

Still Renji was gluten for punishment.

"**Hey guys, I need some help. I've got a song stuck in my head, but I don't know who sings it or what the name is. It goes like this**

_**Show no mercy, people here say**_

"_**Kill the damned fool"**_

_**This illness is like a monster that **_

_**Is eating us alive"**_

Orihime, Tatsuki and Ishida all stood in various states of shock.

"**What? You're all looking at me like I said something inappropriate. Is the song implying something I don't know?"** Renji responded to the stunned silence.

"**No, no it's not that"** Orihime started

"**For once"** Ishida chimed in

"**Wow, you've got an awesome voice; who would have expected, from a loud mouthed, tattooed freak?"** Tatsuki ended, as all three picked their jaws up while Renji blushed madly.

"**Just tell me who sings it." **he growled back at Tatsuki trying to get the information he wanted with out making a big scene.

Tatsuki however didn't get to answer as the teacher walked in shooing everyone to his and her own desk.

_And what do you think you'd ever say?  
I won't listen anyway…  
You don't know me,  
And I'll never be what you want me to be_.

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Credits:

"I'm in a Hurry (and don't know why)" – Alabama

"I Wanna Be There" – Blessed Union of Souls

"Hold On" – Korn

"Hold On" – Korn

"Sinking" – Jars of Clay

"Hold On" – Korn

"I'm Still Here" – Jonny Rzeznik

**Author's Notes: **When I have the time I will make a playlist on playlist dot com and link it so that you may take a listen at the songs I choose to use (assuming I can find links for them). I will take song request and suggestions for future chapters, as I am told a lot that I have very narrow taste in music. I just request english translations at the very least.


	3. Dieing to Live

Dis: I do not own Bleach, the setting or characters. I am not paid to write this.

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_Why must I feel like that  
Why must I chase the cat  
Nothin' but the dog in me_

It was the week before a major tournament, so Tatsuke wasn't put out about the fact that practice ran late. She was however put out about the fact that an obnoxious red-head could be seen from across the school yard sitting in her tree. Just what was he up to asking about the song she had been working out the cords on the previous evening, it was like he was taunting her; what could he possible have to gain? Even more, why had he been watching her? Last night wasn't the first time she'd felt his presence there, just out of her view, and like the previous time she simply ended his show and walked away with out acknowledging him, to acknowledge him would only encourage him she figured, and Ichigo was enough of an egotistical loud mouth presence in her life.

So ignoring him right now is what she chose to do.

_Why do you come here, when you know I've got troubles enough?  
Why do you call me, when you know I can't answer the phone?  
And make me lie when I don't want to,  
And make someone else some kind of an unknowing fool?  
Make me stay when I should not?  
If you're so strong then resolve the weakness in me.  
Why do you come here, and pretend to be just passing by?_

"**Oi, I know you can see me. Stupid human suit or not, you made it clear that you can see me, don't just walk away."** He called after her. She sighed, like an irritating puppy he simply couldn't stand to be ignored, and like any dog she knew looking back would only encourage him to follow her. Still she did it anyway.

"**What do you want Abarai?"** she demanded feeding as much impatience into the phrase as she could, hoping that addressing him by last name only would put him off.

"**Do you treat all of your fans this way?"** he asked with his ear to ear grin.

Tatsuki turned on her heal and started walking off again, she never heard him leave the tree so the punch she threw at him when he placed a hand on her shoulder was pure gut reaction. She knew the shock she felt at him dodging the punch was plastered all over her face; she quickly replaced it with a look of irritation.

"**Look, I just, well this isn't going well at all; is it?" **He mumbled more to himself than to her. "**You're good. Teach me?" **He said rather fast and her ears weren't certain that they'd heard him right.

"**What?"** God, she hated looking so confused around this pompous idiot, the smug smirk on his face irritated her beyond all belief. It irritated her because it reminded her of Ichigo. The obvious lie about them being cousins wasn't so had to believe if you didn't know better.

"**I, I've always wanted to be able to play, got a guitar and all, but" **he paused scratching the back of his head, a slight blush creeping across his face, "**but I suck. Well, I suck at figuring out songs for myself. Once someone shows me I can do it though, and well, you've heard my awesome voice."** The blush was gone now, his wide arrogant smile back on his face, his eyes dancing with it. For not the fist time in this conversation Tatsuki couldn't decide if she wanted to laugh at or smack him.

"**What's in it for me, besides the obvious headache of dealing with your ego? I've already been through this with Ichigo, and I've got the feeling you won't be any easier to teach."** A very noticeable shadow cast over Renji's face. His voice was much softer when he spoke this time.

"**I'm not Ichigo. If you don't want to teach me, just say so, I have nothing to offer a human. I do not carry the currency of this world, though I could teach you how to use and hide what little spiritual energy you do have" **

Anything else he might have said died on his lips as her fist made contact with his gut knocking him into a nearby tree.

"**What the hell."** He shouted dodging her next attacks.

"**Being alive and being human doesn't make me weak, puny or any less than you. I'm sick of you and your friends acting like you're so much better because you are dead."** She growled at him.

No matter how fast she moved she couldn't make contact with him again. It was her turn to become acquainted with the tree. She felt the air rush out of her lungs has he slammed her into the tree holding her by her throat.

"**Shit, do you answer everything by attacking the person who says something you don't like? And you think me like Ichigo? You're a piece of work, Tatsuki."** He let her drop to the ground. She remained there on the ground as he walked away.

"**I'm not weak!"** she shouted at him.

He stopped, but he remained with his back to her.

"**You're just a human. For get it, forget I ever asked, I don't need anything from you or any other human."** She wasn't sure why but his words as offensive as he meant them to be didn't bother her; his tone bothered her, hurt and offensive and insulting now.

"**I'm the toughest high school girl in the nation, there is no way I can be considered weak." **The words felt almost lame leaving her mouth, she felt even more pathetic when he gave a sarcastic laugh in response.

"**Go back to playing with your toy, and I'll go back to killing the monsters that hunt your kind." **His voice was full of a sad sort of malice, like he hated what he was saying, but things had to be that way. As if he had suddenly decided that he couldn't ask her help, that 'human' activities weren't permissible for him.

_If I die before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take  
'Cause I have faith, and I can't wait  
To get these obstacles up outta my face  
'Cause it's my time and it's my grind  
Not even midnight can stop my shine  
Let me confront the ultimate sin  
You're ready to die, but I'm dying to live_

He started walking again with out looking back. She just sat there fuming, not sure what had just happened.

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1. George Clinton - Atomic Dog

2. Joan Armatrading - The Weakness on Me

3. Xzibit - Dying To Live

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I know this was a long time in coming. My plot bunnies have been on summer vaccation. With fall in the air hopfuly they will come in to stay awhile. Same goes to those who are also reading **Homeward Bound**.


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